Royal Watcher Am I

With the Royals in the news of late, this blog seems especially timely as I was just in London recently playing a personal little tribute. But first, the back-story.

When I was a kid...say between ages 10 to 12, I was obsessed with Princess Diana. My Grandmother would save all her People magazines, Enquirers and the like, and I'd cut out the pictures of Diana and baby William and scrapbook them all. My mom got me the Diana Wedding Doll and I probably played with that thing for two years straight. I still have it. Shocked it's not worth anything on eBay (yes, I checked) not that I'd ever part with it. I spent my allowance on Diana picture books.

When she died I was as devastated--walked around in a daze for more than a week. It was a "where were you when you heard the news" type of moment. For me, it was sitting at the breakfast table casually reading a headline. What? Surely Dodi didn't die, can Diana not find happiness? Wait a minute, read the sentence again. OMG. She died too.

So upon a recent trip to London I purposely set out to go the the Diana Memorial at Hyde Park. What a giant disappointment it turned out to be. I literally stood there in shock at the "non" event this thing was. First you come upon a poster. Yep, a plain old poster in plain old frame. You're kidding right?


Then, you look at this circle that is a "fountain" in theory. The flow of water in a continuous circle is to commemorate how her memory flows on continuously. But there was no water in it. A malfunction? Gross neglect? Cold weather? But wait, there were other "fountains" with water in London. I heard children would play in the "fountain" and some got hurt--it is concrete afterall. Perhaps that's why there was no water in it. No flowers, no nothing. Sad and isolated, much like her life turned out to be it would seem. There was a playground for children named after her that was FAR superior to this paltry tribute.

700MM people around the world watched her wedding to Prince Charles and yet this seems to be all that can be done to commemorate an icon who died tragically in a car accident (I will always remain suspicious about it.) It's all just very strange to me but again, I guess if you're a royal the scandal of divorce always hangs over you like a halo...which brings me back to this crazy circle thing. I can only hope that William and Kate find the happiness that their parents didn't have with each other. And yes, I will get up at the crack of dawn to watch the wedding just like I did in 1981.

Random Thoughts

It's time for another edition of random thoughts...these are items of note that I've accumulated in my head since last blogging, so dear Readers, consider yourself caught up.

1) Passports. My first passport photo was taken in the mid-90's when I was at my physical prime. It was a great hair, skin and make up day. I went to a photographer, I was well lit (key for me, as I'm like that Seinfeld character I think when it comes to light). Resulting photo, stunning. Fast forward 15 years for Passport renewal photo and photographers don't do this any more. Yikes. But what about my light? Walgreens they say. Seriously? Is this their core competency? Does the pharmacist come out and take photos on a break or something? I get the photo (oh, and they don't let you smile any more and when I don't smile, my face just naturally looks mad) and where are my eyebrows? And that mane of hair I used to have? Gone. So I look like a mad hairless person. Golum. It's awful. I can't stand the fact that TSA even has to see it. So the conversation with the Husband goes like this.
Me: Passport photo is horrendous. If' I come up missing, under no circumstances is that passport photo to be the one you put on Nancy Grace. Use one of my wedding photos.
Him: But you don't look like that any more. An old photograph would not aid in your rescue.
Me: I would rather not be rescued than to know that "that" photo was all over People magazine and CNN.
2) Next topic. Speaking the Queen's Plain English. I said to a co-worker the other day that I really think I could use a translator. I've gotten to where people speak so "un" clearly around me that I really need help in translation. The first issue is incessant business jargon. If I hear "disruptive" or "inside the box" one more time (which replaced see, outside the box which was about to make me shoot myself.) Inside the box apparently means to think creatively inside the box you're given. So for the next ten years, I guess I have to suffer through that in every meeting. The second issue is the use of words that supposedly make someone sound smart, but instead, said person just sounds ridiculous. For example (subject has been changed as to not incriminate me).
Me: The strawberry in the ad could be a little more red, I'll ask that it be color corrected.
Co-Worker: But I think the strawberry is an illustrious rouge.
Me: Are we talking nail polish or the strawberry?
Co-Worker: (Visibly lost that I'm not on the same page...) Keep it the illustrious rouge that it is.
Me: 'kay
Third issue, unclear direction. I'm sitting in a meeting and the first sentence made sense. The second sentence contradicted the first and then the third sentence had me mouthing to a co-worker, huh? Then of course, I have to raise my hand to make sure I'm tracking along only to be told that the second sentence OF COURSE was what was meant as direction. Naturally.
Perhaps I'm over medicated.
3) Let's see, what am I reading...I'm reading Harem, as I need a little trashy novel every now and again and I'm reading "What the Dog Saw" a Freakonomics type book. Both are very good. I also just finished "Bird by Bird" by Anne Lamont about book publishing--because you know that's on the list of to-dos--quite a life affirming book as well. Thank you KT for this one! She talks of the "Cosmic banana peel." Just when you think your life is going just great, along comes the cosmic banana peel to trip you up. Boy, can I related to that. Amen Ms. Anne Lamont.

Consider yourself caught up.